What A Large Crowd

A man was traveling down a country road when he saw a large group of people outside a house. He stopped and asked a person why the large crowd was there.

A farmer replied, "Joe's mule kicked his mother-in-law and she died."

"Well," replied the man, "she must have had a lot of friends."

"Nope," said the farmer, "we all just want to buy his mule."

The Goldfish Died

Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the rosy-cheeked youngster was up to, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Tim?"


"My goldfish died," replied Tim tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him."


The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"


Tim patted down the last heap of earth then replied, "That's because he's inside your freakin' cat!"